4.02.2018

Strawberry cookies with a special guest appearance from Dr. Greg the One-Eyed Cat Who Loves Cuddles

Product: Parle Hide & Seek Fab!--strawberry flavor
Origin: India

First looks

Katie:
The strawberry smell is strong with these. The cookies seem to be chocolate chip but I'm honestly not sure if that's what the little chips are. The strawberry filling is escaping the side of mine but not all in the package are like that. I'm really not sure what to expect here. If they are chocolate chips, I'm thinking it'll be a hard cookie filled with stiff filling but we've been wrong before in predicting a cookie and filling's consistency.

Nick:
Oh, boy. I'm not so sure about these; strawberry is occasionally okay, but these smell really fake sweet strawberry. A close inspection of the sleeve suggests these are indeed chocolate chips; it also yells "INSIST ON EXPORT PACK ONLY" but I think I'm going to insist on taking the smallest possible bite of these before rendering judgement.

Post-bite thoughts

Katie:
I think I actually quite like these. The strawberry is, as Nick predicted, very fake and very sweet but it works well with the chocolate cookie for me. I don't know if I'll be able to eat the whole package by myself if Nick doesn't like them but I happily ate two for my taste test. Okay, I can't wait anymore. I have to see what Nick thought.

Nick:
Wow, I don't hate these! Katie originally accidentally wrote that the strawberry "works against the chocolate cookie" and I had like a whole witty paragraph about how I disagreed and liked this that was very amusing, trust me, that I had to delete when Katie realized she made an oops and went back and fixed it. Just assume it would have been really hilarious. As it is, these aren't for me - I think if it was, like, raspberry and dark chocolate I'd have liked it more - but they're surprisingly good! Bring these in to work. If you're reading this at work, go get some, uh, three weeks ago when we wrote this because if we don't write ahead we can't keep our posting schedule up to date and our entries would be like "this needed to get posted six days ago!!! FOOD GOOD" or something.

3.30.2018

OMG IT'S ONE GIANT BEAR

Product: Lubisie nazienie czekoladowe
Origin: Poland

First looks

Nick:
All right guys, great news - we've finally found the huge, chocolate-filled, bear-shaped Polish spongecake snack that's both bez barwnikow AND bez substanji konserwuacych!!!! How I have waited for this day! I ripped the bear's head off in celebration and now I'm gonna eat it. Katie got the rest of the bear. Katie, what do you think about this bear? Tell me about this bear.

Katie:
My half of the bear is headless. When he was alive and frolicking through Spongecake Fairy Forest, he oft remarked "I love being alive and not packaged into foil then shipped to America!" His friends, the Spongecake birds and Spongecake foxes would gleefully shout "We also love you being alive, our very best bear friend!"
May he be delicious and not have died in vain.

Post-bite thoughts

Nick:
Oh, gosh. I'm afraid this bear taste is not my favorite; not quite sweet enough, I think. Needs a little more sugar in this bear. It's not bad, but the cake is pretty bland, and the chocolate isn't too amazing either. Maybe they should feed the bears more honey before packaging or something. On the upside, at least the wrapping tells me that this snack is JAJA 12.3% which is always good news (????)

Katie:
I'm sorry this dead, formerly alive bear WASN'T GOOD ENOUGH for you, Nicholas. Must be nice
in your pleasure palace with your room of Doritos and Hawaiian Punch fountains.
I was almost at really liking this. If the cake was just a skosh sweeter and not as dry, I would have enjoyed it far better. I thought the chocolate inside was in good proportion to the cake; just enough to add some flavor.

PS from Nick: Yeah, it is pretty nice.

3.28.2018

More lime stuff

Product: Yupi Rizadas
Origin: Columbia

First looks

Katie:
The chips look like Ruffles and smell like vinegar. We seem to be largely out of step with the rest of the world's taste in chips so I'm hesitant to be too optimistic here. I guess I'm really just hoping they're fine.  They don't have to be great, just okay would work.

Nick:
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold on. Wait a second. Hold up here. I have a bone to pick with the packaging for these. it says they're lemon flavored, and then there's a huge picture of a green lime. Am I about to eat a snack made by people who don't know the difference between a lime and a lemon? Do they think the green ones are lemons? Or are they saying you should eat a lime with this? I'm just saying, if I made a product called RASPBERRY something and had a huge picture of a blueberry looming over it on the label, you'd be like,"Huh, that's weird," and that's what I'm like right now. Also, these smell really disgusting.

Post-bite thoughts

Katie:
Imagine Ruffles, now picture them tasting vinegary, salty, and sort of limey. Blam, you now know what these chips taste like. They're fine. I don't think I'd seek them out but I'd have some again in the future. I'm not terribly impressed but it is nice to have chips that aren't either mega spice, bbq, or sour cream and onion.

Nick:
Ahh... they're all right. Like Katie said, they're like ruffles, but with lime flavoring on them. Not my favorite; I think lemon-flavored potato chips are an acquired taste I haven't acquired. I think I'd really rather just have nice salty Ruffles or sour cream and onion chips. Could be worse, but not really for me.


3.26.2018

Craft Soda for Nerds

Product: Iron Heart Root Beer
Origin: Geneva, NY

First looks

Nick:
Hey, all right, hand crafted root beer! I'm a little uncertain of what's going to be in here; the front of the adorable little can has a dead skeleton guy and his dog riding a bike apparently powered by a oversized patchwork heart, and I don't know how exactly that translates into root beer flavor. Also, the company url is http://ironheart.coffee, which, uh, maybe they make root beer in their spare time. I just hope this isn't gross and bitter like Saranac. Don't let me down, skeleton guy and his dog and bike that somehow is powered by a heart! Maybe there's coffee in there!

Katie:
This root beer was obtained for us from our most dedicated fan, Lauren. Can't wait to try it! It smells perfect. I think the heart represents their love of making root beer, which they love so much one of them came back from the dead to continue brewing it. Their dog does the stirring, which explains why she's there, but don't worry...she wears a fur-neat in the kitchen! Or brew...house. Beer dinette? Wherever it is you make root beer. Nick yelled "the root cellar!" but I don't think that's right.

Post-sip thoughts

have you even noticed how many times
we used this picture? it's all the same color!
And don't leave comments like "oh, what about Sprite?"
you will be banned
Nick:
Quite good! Worth becoming a skeleton on a motorcycle with a skeleton dog, I think. The ingredients list honey, and you can definitely taste it along with a nice vanilla flavor. And there's a taste that's almost.... minty? There's a little bit of a bite at the end whose flavor I can't quite put my finger on. Oh, you know what this tastes like, a liquid high quality root beer barrel candy. Very tasty. Is this the first craft soda we've actually liked?

Katie:
Delicious! My only compliant--and this is so minor it's bordering on petty--is that the can label feels a little weird. However, this can easily be solved by putting the root beer in a glass.  With ice because I'm not some plebeian drinking their soda without ice in it. I'm not some peasant squatting in a yurt sucking down lukewarm root beer like it's 1242 AD and I'm eking out a subsistence farming existence trying to make it to 30 before dying of dysentery. I'm not some savage cave-woman shattering open a cask of root beer and rudely sucking it into my mouth without a care for its temperature. Come on now.

3.24.2018

Caramel what now

Product: Salted Caramel Pepsi
Origin: USA

First looks

Katie:
I saw this at our local gas station while searching for the elusive orange flavor Diet Coke. Not much of a scent to it, but caramel never really smells like much to me unless it's in something warm. I'm cautiously optimistic. I do not like normal Pepsi at all but I was a big fan of Diet Pepsi Vanilla years ago and, of course, I absolutely love 1893 and Ginger 1893. Fingers crossed that I'll be giving you a glowing recommendation to go out into the world and put this in your face holes!

Nick:
Salted Caramel... Pepsi. I am very afraid right now. I feel like I need to put my hazmat suit on before trying this. I mean, I guess soda's sweet, and salted caramel is sweet, but salty soda just seems a little weird. I cheated and waited to watch Katie try it, and she's going back for seconds, so I guess it can't be that bad.

Post-sip thoughts

Katie:
Well...uh...hmm.  My mouth is confused. On the one hand, it's kind of good.  On the other hand, it's odd as if the two liquids (regular Pepsi and the salted caramel flavor) aren't really mixed together all the way.  Have you ever been to a restaurant like Johnny Rocket's that lets you order a soda with flavored syrup added?  So you could get a Coke with chocolate syrup in it that winds up tasting like tootsie roll soda? To me, it's good but it tastes like the chocolate part is just sitting on top of the Coke part as opposed to something like Vanilla Coke--as bottled by Coke and not swooshed together by a restaurant--where the two flavors are really melded together. I hope you have or those last two questions won't make any sense.  Anyway, this is...worth a try I think. It's different and definitely is not bad but is a little odd. Maybe it would pair well with something spicy or sour as a way to break up the taste?

Nick:
Uhhhh... this is actually quite tasty. I think the only way this would work is by maximizing the Pepsi or the salted caramel taste, and this is like 99% powerful caramel flavor; the salt and the pepsi are barely noticeable at all, and it turns out caramel soda actually tastes pretty good! I don't know how much of this I'd get, but it's very nice and sweet. Phew! We made it, everyone!

3.22.2018

Rose DeWitt Bu-water

Product: Fentiman's Rose Lemonade
Origin: UK, Canada, or the US depending on where you look on the bottle

First looks

Nick:
I'm just a little concerned about this stuff; it yells BOTANICALLY BREWED and I don't know what that means and I don't like rose-flavored stuff (see the Turkish Delight) and it smells kinda medicinal. The first two ingredients are water and cane sugar, so I'm just hoping for either nice pink sugar water or a nice sweet lemonade.

Katie:
I like the pink color.  The smell is just sort of floral to my somewhat allergy-enraged nose. This drink proudly contains 16% fruit juice, which is 16% more fruit juice than seemingly most of the things labelled as fruit juice or fruit drinks in America. Nick made a weird noise when he drank his, which he swears is because he's cold but the situation now feels ominous. If I die, pretend I said something cool and profound.

Post-sip thoughts

Nick:
Well, in retrospect this is exactly what it says on the bottle - the label promises "Ginger and pure rose extracts", and the main taste is ginger with a rose undertaste. Unfortunately, ginger and rose flavored lemonade isn't very good. Just too ginger-y for me. No thank you. I managed a few sips and I'm done, fam.

Katie:
What. the. french. toast. Completely gross. I couldn't make it past one sip, my dudes. Fermented anything seems to be just not for me. Blech. I had been really looking forward to trying this too. Very disappointed, dog who made this abominable concoction.

3.20.2018

Nick's enemy--Pineapple--returns

Product: Pineapple jam biscuits
Origin: Malaysia

First looks

Katie:
I think this might be our first food from Malaysia so I'm looking forward to trying it on that count. Very fruity smelling round crackers with pineapple goo inside. I'm very unsure of how this will taste. Hopefully delicious!

Nick:
Oh, man. Smells like these are still outgassing. I don't know where Katie is getting fruit from; smells like 100% plastic to me. Like I got a cheap screwdriver where I opened the package and it smelled like super strong cheap plastic, and this is like that except I'm expected to eat it? I'm going to bravely try the world's tiniest bite of this. Pray for the hams.

Post-bite thoughts

Katie:
I mostly just tasted the buttery cracker part.  The jam was a little chewier than I expected but once I got past that, this was fine. I don't really get much pineapple from this but that's probably a good thing considering I've never seen pineapple and crackers combined before. This is unique enough that I'm going to recommend trying it if you ever seen it. This is the type of thing I was hoping we'd get with Munchpak, something truly unique that you can't really find here. While I really liked the ketchup chips a few entries back, ketchup chips aren't that unheard of. Trying something like pineapple jam biscuits is the kind of taste adventure I was hoping for when we signed up for the Munchpak boxes.  Even if something isn't great or we didn't like it, it's neat to try something so far removed from our sheltered American food experience.

Nick:
This is the type of thing you were hoping for?! This smells, looks and tastes like a blob of glue between two admittedly nice buttery crackers. I mean, I want to try new stuff too, but I was thinking more the last entry's mystery tube and not industrial solvent pressed between two biscuits. Did you pick this because I ate too much mystery tube? Is this my punishment??

PS from Katie:
Yes.
Also where's your sense of whimsy and adventure? We had a mystery tube and pineapple biscuits!

3.16.2018

A grey animal dressed as a samurai rides a cow into a bar...

Product: Literally no idea
Origin: Japan

First looks

Nick:
Uh.... okay. I'm not often totally stumped, but I really don't know what to make of this. It's a large, uh, crispy-looking tube that smells like sour cream and onion potato chip flavoring. Is this like a huge tube-shaped potato chip? I'm so lost right now. The smell is actually pretty pleasant, so if the texture is nice this should be good.

Katie:
Usually, there's a sticker on the package that translates at least some of what the package is. It might say "sugar candy snack" or "cream sandwich", but there's usually something there to clue us in. This has nothing except a grey animal dressed like a samurai riding a cow, wielding a sword made out of the snack. The smell was a little weird to me, I hope this isn't secretly seafood.  If anyone can translate this, please let us know what we're about to eat.

Post-bite thoughts

Nick:
Um... I actually like this quite a bit. Despite smelling like sour cream and onion or maybe ranch, it actually tastes like spicy ketchup or maybe BBQ sauce. Is it supposed to be meat flavored? Is the cat wearing the samurai armor eating the cow? I don't know. It's pretty good, although I think it might be just a little weird to get more of. I'm just happy it tasted good and not like seafood like Katie was worried about. Phew!

Katie:
I liked it but it had this really weird taste to it. I don't know what it was but it was like nothing I've ever tasted. Maybe this is like seaweed or something? I mean it's not green but there was something really odd to the flavoring.
I figured Nick must have liked it too because he at 80% of it before I got any!!!!!! He was kissing it and yelling "Mystery tube, you are my wife now!" but then I ate the rest. Hahahahahaha

3.14.2018

Lobster tested, krewe approved

Product: Zapp's New Orleans Kettle Style Sour Cream and Creole Onion potato chips
Origin: Hanover, Pennsylvania--the New Orleans of the Northeast!

First looks

Nick:
Listen, punk, these aren't just sour cream and onion potato chips; these are Creole onion potato chips, whatever that means! I'm actually glad these are made in PA, because all I know about New Orleans is what I saw in Princess and the Frog and NCIS: New Orleans, which just had a bunch of vaguely handsome guys with ridiculous accents yelling at sassy black women, and there wasn't even a single creole onion there. Anyway, these smell like vaguely farty salt, so we'll see.

Katie:
I think someone is forgetting we stayed at Port Orleans: French Quarter 3 times! We are experts! For example, I can tell you that gators play all the instruments at Mardi Gras and if there isn't a street called "Rue D'Baga" in New Orleans for real, I'm going to be very disappointed in Walt Disney World's lack of realism in its hotel street naming.
Also these chips don't smell that great as Nick mentioned.

Post-bite thoughts

Nick:
Not bad! I guess I don't taste any difference between Creole onions and regular ones, because these just taste like nice, regular sour cream and onion chips. Oh, also, remember Gambit? He's always be like "Gambit see no future in (pause) the CARDS for you, mon ami" because he threw like exploding cards, and he always had to end his sentence with "mon ami" and also he had this really weird headgear that framed his face like he was wearing a jockstrap. Anyway, these are fine. I almost wish they had a little bit more of a bite, like a little bit of a vinegar flavor. Nick doesn't see himself buying more of this particular flavor in (pause) the CARDS, mon ami. Also, I can't throw cards because of the shape, they just like fall right down. He should've thrown darts, or maybe even dice? Those actually kind of go where you throw them. Seriously, try throwing a playing card. That doesn't work!!!

Katie:
Uh, actually...he's not throwing exploding cards, sir, he's activating the potential kinetic energy IN the cards. I think. I believe he can do it with anything so I don't really know why he picked cards. Easy to conceal? If he gets stopped by the TSA, he can just be like "I like to play THE CARDS" whereas if he has darts, he can't get on a plane (and don't say they can just take their X-men jet--which had a name but all I can think is the quinjet from the Avengers--because you can't just fly that into Orlando Airport so you can go the Disney and Universal). Gambit, Jubilee, and Wolverine were my favorites in the cartoons. I always felt like Jubilee's powers were supposed to be cooler and more effective but the network couldn't have a young teenage girl throwing pyrotechnics at people's faces.
I've been reminded to talk about the snack. It was good--no better or worse than any other sour cream and onion chip I've had. The chip itself was crunchy, no greasy pieces at all. A good grab if you're looking for sour cream and onion chips.

3.12.2018

Pine tried Nickapple juice!!!!

Product: Teptip Brand Pineapple Juice
Origin: Thailand

First looks

Katie:
Smells kind of pineapple-y, I guess. I believe I will be bravely trying this on my own (how often does that happen, one regular reader that we have?) because Nick doesn't like pineapples. I like them when they're nice and fresh but I'm not sure I'd like an entire can of pineapple juice.  I guess we'll find out together!

Nick:
I don't think I've ever had good pineapple; all the times I've tried it it's been disgusting and extremely bitter, but people who like pineapple are like "That's not what good pineapple tastes like," so maybe I'll try this if Katie says it tastes like good pineapple. This product was approved by the Islamic Committee Office of Thailand, so I trust if there's any good pineapple to be found, it's in here.

Post-sip thoughts

Katie:
It's certainly pineapple. It's completely okay juice. I think I might not like pineapple as much as I thought. I usually have it alongside watermelon where it's a welcome break between super sweet watermelon bites. Here, the pineapple is on its own and I'm not finding it's my favorite fruit at all. If you like pineapples a bunch, this will be something for you to see out. If pineapples are just a novelty fruit you mainly have in cubed fruit trays twice a year, maybe not so much.

Nick:
Well, this is the least bad pineapple I've ever had, so all praise to Teptip and the Islamic Committee Office of Thailand for producing a pineapple product that I didn't immediately spit into the sink while crying. That being said, I still don't like this much; I guess I'm used to a lot sweeter taste when I'm drinking juice, and this is just a bit bitter for me, but I can at least say this is just not for me instead of being disgusting.