4.29.2021

Salsa Taste Test

Nick makes me veggie fajitas every Saturday (peppers and onions, no meat). I had been using Pace's Serrano Pineapple salsa, but that seems to have been discontinued. I thought it would be fun to try several different salsas with my Mom (Susan), brother (Mike), and the two of us. We only took one picture of the taco bowls we made at the end with the winning salsa(s) since pictures of 10 jars of salsa wouldn't have been interesting.

All ratings are out of 5.

Los Panchos Restaurant Salsa

Susan - 4, Mike - 5, Katie - 4.5, Nick - 4.5

Nick:

Well, not to spoil this whole post, but I would be shocked if this wasn't the best stuff; this is authentic salsa from a local Mexican restaurant. And it's great! This is exactly what I think of when I think of salsa. It's the Platonic salsa that exists in the world of forms or whatever it is. I did 4.5 in case one of the other ones really blew me away and redefined my understanding of salsa, which you'll have to read on to see if that happened.

Katie:

I think Nick said it best. This was good and exactly what I think of when I think of salsa.

Indian Ladder Apple Salsa

Susan - 4.5, Mike - 4.5, Katie - 5, Nick - 4.5

Katie:

My old favorite! Before the pandemic, we would drive out to Indian Ladder farms and stock up on this literal boxes at a time. I would carefully ration out my apple salsa over the winter when the farm wouldn't be open to get more. I think we stopped getting it mainly because of the pandemic and the farm not always having some in stock. It is on the sweet side but I still really enjoyed it.

Nick:

WHOOH, this was sweet! Between the extreme sweetness and maximum chunkosity, this was more like jam than salsa. Tasted good on a salty chip, but I don't know if this would really fit well in some spots where you would use traditional salsa. 

Los Panchos Queso

Susan - 4.5, Mike - 4, Katie - 4, Nick - N/A

Nick:

I had to do N/A on this one as I can't eat cheese without turning into a weapon of mass destruction. Tasted good, but I only had a tiny bit. Nice and creamy. I bet this would cut down spice nicely.

Katie:

I thought this was good. It wasn't too thicky or overly favoring one type of cheese. You know the kind, where it might as well be just melted cheddar instead of a melty saucey cheese blendy thing.

Mrs. Renfro's Craft Beer Salsa

Susan - 0, Mike - 2, Katie - 0, Nick - 0

Katie:

At first, I was like "oh this is fine" but then the beer kicked in and I was like "yuck!". I have never liked beer. It tastes like what pee smells like to me. Sorry, beer fans.

Nick:

Oh NOOOOOOOO. Mrs. Renfro, what are you doing?! Is this what beer tastes like? This didn't taste like salsa it all; it tasted like kind of sour dirt. This may be one of the most disgusting tastes I have ever experienced. This doesn't even deserve the name salsa. Mrs. Renfro's Disgraced Butt Dirt Tasting Product For Bad People. Richly earned zeroes! 

Mrs. Renfro's Blackberry Serrano

Susan - 1, Mike - 2.5, Katie - 2.5, Nick - 2.5

Nick:

After that nasty last one, I was very worried Mrs. Renfro was going to kill us with this follow-up salsa. It's actually not bad, but it's very odd. When you eat salsa, are you looking for a spicy blueberry taste? I'm not, and my mouth was super confused eating this. I think this might be delicious as, like, a very lightly applied sauce on top of a sweet cake or something. As salsa, I'm really struggling to think when and where you would want this.

Katie:

You know, this was actually kind of good but when would you use it? I suppose some adventurous and creative home-chef could use it for a breakfast twist of some kind. It definitely wouldn't belong on a dinner food due to how sweet it was. Still, if you ever want a really sweet salsa for something...you could pick this up.

Frontero Roasted Tomato Salsa

Susan - N/A, Mike - 0.5, Katie - 0, Nick -1

Katie:

I think we had a review where we discussed smokiness having infused flavor versus tasting like a campfire in a can. This was the latter. It was salsa with smoke on top of it. Not good, my friends.

Nick:

Ouch, look at those scores! We all hated this because it was packed with fake smoke flavor. Just tasted like eatin' a campfire. I like smoke flavor, and as you can see from my one being the highest score for this, we all basically agreed this was trash that belongs in the garbage. I don't know that I'm looking for a smoky taste in salsa to begin with, but if I was, this is definitely not to pull it off.

Desert Pepper Peach Mango

Susan - 1, Mike - 3, Katie - 1.5, Nick - 0.5

Nick:

WHOOH boy, this was nasty AF. I actually liked this less than the fake smoke flavor; I don't know if it was the mango or the peach, but this had an absolutely disgusting fake fruit flavor that I could not stand. Absolutely terrible. 

Katie:

I don't think the mango was good in this. I think the peach might have been okay but the mango threw things off. I think I've liked mango in other places just not here. Boo.

Pace Restaurant Style

Susan - 3, Mike - 4, Katie - 4, Nick - 4

Katie:

This was good! If we hadn't had the salsa from Los Panchos, this might have won. I think Los Panchos had something to it that set it apart though. Don't ask me what it was...perhaps the secret ingredient was the friendship we'd made along the way. 

Nick:

Very good! I think this is as good as you're going to get in a jar of salsa you get from the supermarket. Like the Los Panchos Restaurant stuff, this is exactly what I think of when I envision salsa, and the fact that it can almost match up to fresh, locally made salsa is pretty impressive for a jarred product. This is probably what I'd be reaching for if I don't feel like going to Los Panchos. 

Newman's Own Peach

Susan - 3.5, Mike - 4, Katie - 3, Nick - 0

Nick:

Maybe it was the peach I didn't like up there in the Desert Pepper Peach Mango, because this was nasty.  I think I just hate peach taste; everyone else seemed to like this quite a bit, so my guess is there's nothing wrong with this, I just can't stand the peach taste. Eugh.


Katie:

I knew the peach would be fine on its own! This is going on my last of back-up flavors along with the pineapple version I'd already liked. Funnily enough, I don't much care for the non-fruit flavors of Newman's Own. Go Figure.

BONUS: Nature's Promise Red Pepper Hummus

Susan - N/A, Mike - 4, Katie - 3.5, Nick - 3

Katie:

I liked this a lot. It was very smooth, not at all gritty like some hummus can be. 

Nick:

"Nature's Promise: When They're Out Of Sabra™"

We all decided that Los Panchos and the apple salsa were the winners. My mom had the idea of mixing the two together, which was genius and flipping delicious. In the time since the taste test, I had an impromptu fajita night and had a live pilot of the two flavors together. I ain't never going back! It was awesome!

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